Don't Drop the Soap, or the Shampoo Either
by dbst
Summary: Shawn helps and old friend with a case, and ends up in jail. Can he solve the case and get out of jail before he becomes the next victim?
1. Flashback

Santa Barbra - Some Years Ago

The sun shone brightly over the man as he prepared himself for the day's work ahead. He ran through a mental checklist getting everything in order before starting the job. Mow the lawn, trim the hedges, fix the squeaky window, take Shawn for a haircut, and do the…

Where is Shawn? he wondered to himself noticing for the first for the first time the quiet that permeated the house. To Henry the quiet was unnatural, since the four years his wife gave birth to their son he had yet to have a quiet moment that didn't result in tears and broken bones. One would be surprised at how many trips to the emergency room a person could make in four short years. Leaving the sanctity of his kitchen he braced himself for whatever mess he'd find Shawn in this time.

To his utter lack of surprise it was crying that alerted him to his son's presence. Shawn, and the boy's best friend, Gus were playing on the front lawn. Well, Shawn was playing. Gus, on the other hand, was silently crying into his sleeve.

"Gus" The boy refused to look up, choosing to employ the "I can't see you so you can't see me, so there' method instead. That might work on his own parents, but not on hardened cop Henry Spencer.

"Gus, come here now." The tone of voice made it clear he wouldn't back to hardened criminals, or crying four year old boys. The young boy finally looked up and commenced to blow his nose on his sleeve before walking over to the much larger man. Bending down on one knee so that they were eye level he addressed the boy.

"Now Gus," he said in a softer voice this time. He didn't want the boy to wet his pants in addition to his eyes, "what's the matter?"

"Shawnstolemyfavoritetoyinthewholewideworldandhewon'tgivehimback."

"Whoa! Slow down buddy, my ears don't work as fast as your mouth. Now blow your nose." Before Henry could offer the boy a tissue Gus was already wiping his face again leaving a trail of slimy substance in its wake.

"Okay, think you're ready to speak clearly?" The boy nodded his affirmation. "All right. Go ahead."

"Shawn stole my favorite toy in the whole wide world and won't give him back."

And sure enough when Henry looked his son was a few feet away setting a teddy bear up in front of what looked to be a water gun firing squad.

"Shawn. Over. Here. Now." Reluctantly, the boy dropped the water gun and walked toward his father. "Why did you take Gus's bear?"

"I didn't take him, I arrested him." The boy looked at him as if it were t5he simplest thing in the world.

"And what did you arrest him for?" Henry asked.

"Um…because he ate all the cookies even though his mom told him it was too early."

"Okay Shawn lets go you're on time out."

"But why I didn't do anything!" 

"First of all Shawn if you're going to pin a crime on someone else make sure there's no evidence left on you." He cupped his son's face in one hand, turning it one side, then the other. "Like chocolate from chocolate chip cookies caked all over your face and hands. And for that matter Gus come on you too." 

"But I didn't take any cookies" the little boy said.

"Doesn't matter if you're going to let your best friend do something stupid you're going to face consequences as well."

"But dad…" Shawn pleaded.

"But nothing Shawn lets go. If you're going to commit the crime, expect to do the time."


	2. Courtrooms and Chatter

A/N Hey here's the newest chapter : ) Hope you guys like it, if you do leave it in a review please.

Disclaimer: Not mine. Not now, Not ever.

"Shawn what are we doing here?" the immaculately dressed man asked his sloppy counterpart.

"A friend asked me to swing by as a favor." the pseudo psychic replied cheerily.

"Why would a friend just ask you to 'swing by' the courthouse" Gus asked happily inserting air quotes in his question. He surveyed the scene around him. Professional looking types hurried about in a self-important strut, their expensive shoes making a 'clack clack' sound on the marble floors. Court officers stood tall and impeccably straight casting a looming figure as to prevent anyone from entering the courtrooms.

No, it was just one courtroom that was blocked off by guards. And reporters. And a large crowd of people. And it was the one Shawn was walking toward.

"Shawn I think we're going the wrong way" Gus said hoping his friend would realize his mistake and they'd both go merrily on their way and possibly get some tacos before heading back to the office to watch some TV. But, as Gus had learned the hard way (he'd spent almost an entire month without eyebrows in his freshman year) hoping Shawn would do something would get you nowhere, expect maybe the emergency room.

Instead of acknowledging Gus's comment with a "Dude I know what I'm doing' or 'Gus Don't be a dented whiffle ball bat the always sends the ball straight to first base resulting in an automatic out' or any of the other million things he could have said Shawn just ignored him.

This was bad.

"Shawn wh…" Gus was cut off as Shawn held up a hand to quiet him. They'd reached the courtroom door. While all Gus could see were the looming guards or throngs of people trying to push their way into the courtroom, Shawn seemed to notice none of it. Instead he locked eyes with the guard and walked directly toward him. The crowd seemed to part for the strange man who eluded so much confidence.

"This is a closed trail" the guard said, angry for having to repeat himself for what must have been the millionth time that morning.

""I know my name is Milton Mango Jenkins and this is my associate W-I-l-b-e-r Berstiehn" Shawn said putting a faux French accent on Gus's alias motioning briefly to Gus as he spoke before moving his attention back to the guard. "We're with the Santa Barbra Police Department and we're here to deliver this evidence to the prosecution." As he talked he reached into his jacket pocket to show off the corner of a manila envelope with what looked to be a Central Coast Pharmaceuticals logo printed on it.

The guard looked briefly from Shawn, to the envelope, to Gus, then back to Shawn again before finally deciding he didn't get paid enough for his job. Shaking his head he opened the door for the detective duo to pass through.

Inside the courtroom people crowded the benches. What could only be the defense attorney was arguing that his client could have in no way have committed the crime he was being accused of. Even as Gus looked at all of this he could think of no reason as to why he or Shawn were there. None of the people there has ever been a client or even an acquaintance as far as Gus knew.

"Shawn …Shawn!" It seemed in the brief seconds Gus had taken his eyes off him Shawn had disappeared into the courtroom.

"Excuse me your honor may I say something?" Gus heard Shawn's voice and immediately he sighted his friend who was about five feet from the bench and advancing. On an angry looking judge." Try as he might, Gus could think of no reason for their presence here. There was no case to solve and Gus didn't believe there was any "friend" who would ask Shawn to just 'swing by' the courtroom. No, there had to be more than this.

"You have exactly thirty seconds to explain who you are and what you're doing before I have you ejected from this courtroom" the judge said glaring at Shawn.

"I am here…" Shawn started bringing two fingers to his forehead in his trademark style, his voice reverberating across the courtroom. "…to tell you that… you are an idiot."

"Excuse me?" the judge said momentarily perplexed.

"First of all," Shawn continued as if the judge had never even spoken, "you're sitting up here this entire time and not once do you take advantage of the awesome gavel situation. You could be tapping out the beat to Iron Man as we speak." Shawn seemed to consider that for a moment. "The song not the new movie although that does look amazing doesn't it?" Mummers of consent filled the room as Gus tried to hide himself from view. Whatever Shawn was doing, he did not want to be connected to it.

"Young man you better control yourself before I charge you with contempt."

"…you just sit up here making all these angry faces like you've already convinced yourself this man is guilty." Shawn continued.

"I'm warning you."

"What it's not like we didn't know he was guilty anyway." Shawn said.

"Hey" both the defendant and his attorney said at once. "You're honor I will not stand to have this man, whoever he is, verbally abuse my client…"

"I mean come on look at him…"

"Your honor…"

"I mean who wears a hoop earring…"

"Am I wrong to think that this is a court of law…" the prosecutor chimed in.

Their voices blended together and continued to rise until the judge though he was going to lose control over the room.

"Young man I find you in contempt of court and sentence you to thirty days in state prison" the judge said yelling to be heard over the mob that at once quieted down. "Bailiff take him away."

Gus watched in stunned disbelief as Shawn broke into a smile while he was put into handcuffs.

As he was being sworn Shawn winked at him.


	3. Easy ExplanationsYeah Right

Disclaimer: None of this belongs to me

A/N: Okay I promise I'm going to be quicker updating, for real this time.

"Oh my God. This is it. This is finally it. This is how Psych is going to end." Gus said in what seemed like a daze as he stood across from Shawn who looked to be seated comfortably as if this wasn't the end of everything. They were; thanks to the chief, sitting in the interrogation room until Shawn could be processed, or until as she put it 'her could stop spinning long enough for her to figure out why her psychic detective was being sent to prison.

"Stop being so melodramatic Gus." Shawn said nonchalantly, "I'm only going to be in jail four days…maybe six." He paused to consider that for a moment, "A week and a half. Tops."

"It doesn't matter Shawn" Gus said his eyes bugging out the way they did whenever he was desperately trying to get his point across. "Do you really think anyone will want to hire you now that you have a criminal record? And forger about working for the police."

"Dude what are you talking about? I've had a criminal record since I was seventeen." Shawn said matter of factly. "The clients think its cool, I'm like a badass who can get things done. In fact getting arrested is way cooler than that vest I got at that bar."

"No Shawn this isn't cool, this is stupid."

"Come on Gus, this makes me so cool I could pull off Angel easy." Shawn said beaming.

"Shawn no way spending one month in prison makes you as cool as a two hundred and fifty year old vampire who killed thousands of people before being re-ensouled and joining the fight against evil to atone for his sins."

"Lucky for us we never have to find that out" Lassiter said opening the door looking stern. "Besides you'd never rate more than Xander anyway." Shawn and Gus both exchanged shocked looks.

"Lassie! I didn't know you were a 'Buffy' fan. You and Gus could totally get together and have Buffy viewing parties together, so that Gus doesn't have to do it alone."

"I don't do that" Gus said trying to save face in front of Lassiter.

"Yes you do" Shawn shot back.

"No I don't."

"Yes. You do" Soon the men's voices blended together as they argued back and forth silently as though there was no one else there. And, see how Lassiter was standing not two feet from them things quickly got awkward. Neither man gave any ground but it seemed as soon as it started their verbal scuffle was over and Shawn quickly got the conversation rolling again.

"So Lassie what bring you here?" Shawn asked as if seeing a detective in a police station was something foreign to him.

"I'm here to save your sorry ass" the detective said.

"You mean he can go home" Gus asked in disbelief.

"Yes," Lassiter said moving further into the room as he talked, "I just spent all morning talking to the judge who you thoroughly embarrassed during the biggest case of his life…"

"That would make you the perfect person to talk to him" Shawn interrupted. Lassiter simply glared at Shawn who then looked at Gus for a conformation he quickly got.

Glaring now at the both of them Lassiter continued, "He said he'll commute your sentence if you issue a full apology."

"I can't." Shawn said looking more serious than he had in a long time.

"And why in the sweet name of lady justice not Spencer?" Lassiter asked.

"Shawn don't be stupid" Gus said.

"Yeah Spencer listen to your friend for once. You do not want to go to prison, not with all the people you've put there."

"Look," Shawn started, "I've got a feeling. Nay I vibe that I need to be there."

"Are you saying you have a case?" Lassiter asked. Shawn didn't answer the question but a look passed between the two men. Even if Lassiter didn't always like Spencer's methods he couldn't in good faith argue that he didn't get the results. And, more importantly, over the last four years he had come to _trust _the younger man. "Fine Spencer, but be careful." He moved even closer to the younger man, so close in fact that he was looking down into Shawn's eyes. "And I want word the minute something happens. Promise Spencer." There was an intensity to the detective that Shawn had never seen before. Gus had, when they were up on the clock tower with Juliet.

"Okay Lassie I promise, regular updates." Looking satisfied Lassiter finally backed away and started out of the room. He turned around to look over his shoulder as he walked through the door.

"I'm mean it Spencer" Then he shut the door behind him.

"Wow when did Lassie develop such a man crush?" Shawn asked Gus trying to lighten the mood though he was clearly rattled. Well, it was clear to Gus who had know him forever.

"Shawn don't joke he's just worried about you especially after the whole Yin thing. You should have seen him up on the clock tower with Juliet." The truth was that Shawn was glad he wasn't there, he knew he'd never sleep again with the image of Juliet in such danger burned into his mind. "You're lucky that she'd still visiting family because she'd never let you do this."

"I have to do this Gus." Shawn said.

"Why Shawn, cause you still never told me who this 'friend' of yours is."

"Its Jamie" That was enough to calm Gus. Jamie was one of Shawn's past girlfriends, the only one he'd ever met from Shawn's time on the road. Before Juliet Gus would have bet everything that if Shawn were ever going to settle down it would have been with Jamie. And he probably would have if she hadn't broken his heart.

"She asked to get yourself arrested?" Gus asked.

"No," Shawn said sighing as he leant against the table, "she asked me get justice for her murdered little brother." Gus was floored, and it seemed that Shawn was as well. "He'd gotten into some trouble and got picked up for petty robbery, sentenced to a year but he got knifed before he could ever serve his sentence."

Knowing he'd have to proceed carefully Gus took a seat next to Shawn on the table before he started. "Shawn stuff like that happens in prison all the time, there's probably no case there."

"No!" Shawn jumped to his feet and started pacing the way he usually did when he needed to explain something troubling to Gus.

"I told Jamie that and she said that Aiden had been worried the last few times she went to see him. Always nervous, afraid. He told her two of his buddies had already been killed and that he was afraid he was next. And he was right." Gus knew that Shawn was beating himself up for this even though none of it was his fault. "I know what your thinking Gus, that there's still no case, but there is. I looked into. The kids that died, Aiden included were small time, busted for petty crimes. They had no gang afflictions, nobody would gain anything for killing them. It was only those three that were killed, which means somebody was targeting them and hoping the guards would just play it off as another gang stabbing. And they were right, nobody else will investigate this, so it's up to me."

"Shawn are you sure you can do this?"

"I have to." Shawn said somberly. The door opened before either of them could say another word.

"I'm sorry Shawn" Buzz Mcnabb said nervously "but I have to take you to get processed now." Any trace of the effect the conversation had on Shawn was gone in an instant and he eagerly bounced off the table and lead Buzz out of the room like they were going to get delicious pineapple smoothies instead of processing. As he disappeared down the hall Gus heard Shawn ask Buzz to come and visit him in the big house.


End file.
